Darren
05-19-2003, 12:54 PM
I got this from my contacts at the league office. It is an official conversation between Andy Reid and Jim Fassel. It is completely authentic. Enjoy.
Fassel: Hey, Andy...you got any players you don't want? We're trying to be like you guys.
Reid: Sure, you can have Brian Mitchell...he's 60 years old, but trust me...he can still break one. Trust me.
Fassel: OK, thanks buddy. Anyone else?
Reid: Sure, you can have Dorsey Levens...he's even older than Brian. Can't run at all, but sure can throw a block now and then.
Fassel: Sounds great!! We'll take him, too. How 'bout that Hugh Douglas? Can we pretty please have him?
Reid: Sure...here you g'....oh, nevermind...Jacksonville just snatched him. How would you like Sean Landeta, the 90 year old kicker that tore his quad muscle right off the bone last year during a routine punt?
Fassel: Are you kidding? WE'D LOVE HIM!!! Thanks, Andy.
Reid: Oooohh, sorry kiddo...the Rams just nabbed him. But Jeff Feagles is available. He used to punt for us for years...was damn good, too.
Fassel: You're too kind, Andy. Thanks, man. Anything else you can do for us?
Reid: Tell you what I'm gonna do...I'll give you the inside track on defensive end John Frank...our 6th round draft choice from last year who retired before the season started b/c he didn't 'feel' like playing football anymore.
Fassel: You're the best, Andy!! We just signed him. He'll be a great addition to Big Blue! One thing, though, why did you guys have to go and steal our guy, Jerome McDougal? I really wanted him.
Reid: Because we're smarter than you, Jim.
Fassel: Oh, well since you were so kind to us, are there any of our players that you'd like, Andy?
Reid: No thanks, Jim. We wouldn't want to touch any of your garbage. Tell Shockey he's a faggot. Later.
Fassel: Uh, see ya, buddy.
Fassel: Hey, Andy...you got any players you don't want? We're trying to be like you guys.
Reid: Sure, you can have Brian Mitchell...he's 60 years old, but trust me...he can still break one. Trust me.
Fassel: OK, thanks buddy. Anyone else?
Reid: Sure, you can have Dorsey Levens...he's even older than Brian. Can't run at all, but sure can throw a block now and then.
Fassel: Sounds great!! We'll take him, too. How 'bout that Hugh Douglas? Can we pretty please have him?
Reid: Sure...here you g'....oh, nevermind...Jacksonville just snatched him. How would you like Sean Landeta, the 90 year old kicker that tore his quad muscle right off the bone last year during a routine punt?
Fassel: Are you kidding? WE'D LOVE HIM!!! Thanks, Andy.
Reid: Oooohh, sorry kiddo...the Rams just nabbed him. But Jeff Feagles is available. He used to punt for us for years...was damn good, too.
Fassel: You're too kind, Andy. Thanks, man. Anything else you can do for us?
Reid: Tell you what I'm gonna do...I'll give you the inside track on defensive end John Frank...our 6th round draft choice from last year who retired before the season started b/c he didn't 'feel' like playing football anymore.
Fassel: You're the best, Andy!! We just signed him. He'll be a great addition to Big Blue! One thing, though, why did you guys have to go and steal our guy, Jerome McDougal? I really wanted him.
Reid: Because we're smarter than you, Jim.
Fassel: Oh, well since you were so kind to us, are there any of our players that you'd like, Andy?
Reid: No thanks, Jim. We wouldn't want to touch any of your garbage. Tell Shockey he's a faggot. Later.
Fassel: Uh, see ya, buddy.